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Skrufff Bites :: Skrufff.com

Reported by Trackitdown TID on May 22, 2006

“A screwdriver is hardly the most flexible of items and I don’t think people realise the damage this could do to their gums.” (Sunday Times)

 

British Dental Health Foundation chief Nigel Carter comments on findings of a new survey which reveals significant numbers of Brits floss their teeth with screwdrivers, scissors, paper clips, nail files and knives.

 

“The club scene is very insular, it’s very hedonistic and very focused on having a good time. A lot of people need that escapism. The trouble is when you lose sight of what’s happening beyond the scene and some people do tend to do that.” (Time Out)

 

Ex FIST promoter Suzy Kruger explains why she left club-land to try (though failed) to win a seat as a Liberal Democrat councillor in last week’s London elections.

 

“’Cardigans’, ‘sandals and socks’, ‘corrupt’, ‘traditionalist’ and ‘stagnant’.”

 

The Church Of England publish a report on young people’s perceptions of the struggling Institution.

 

“Nasty bosses really do recline and clasp their hands behind their head in David Brent style while talking to staff, research reveals. The gesture, baring armpits in the listeners direction, is a way of imposing superiority.” (Metro)

 

An Office Angels survey suggests body language clichés are true.

 

“Can we just stop talking about ‘minimal’? I’m F++king bored of that word. What people call minimal these days, it’s not even minimal.” (DJ/ Ibiza-Voice)

 

Minimal mainman Steve Bug bugs out.

 

“If only my wife was this dirty”. (Sunday Times)

 

A survey for Asda Motor Insurance reveals the UK’s most popular insult written on dirty white vans.

 

“When I was a student, I took one or two puffs or marijuana but that was it. I think it was once or twice.” (Guardian)

 

Labour’s new Home Office/ drugs minister Vernon Coaker confesses to taking illegal drugs at Warwick University in the 70s.

 

“I know it sounds crazy...but could things in America be getting...better? Are Americans waking up from a somnambulant era wherein rape rock ruled the airwaves and small penised men drove cars that got 4 miles to the gallon and people gave their approval to a president who lied every time he opened his weasely little mouth?” (Moby.com)

 

Moby dares to dream that Democrats win power and impeach George W.

 

“I see these people wearing silly glasses and moustaches and it doesn’t interest me. Even Madonna is doing electronic disco but what surprises me is that it’s still so popular.” (DJ Magazine)

 

Alden Tyrell lays into electroclash.

 

“Electro can be annoying when it’s cheap, but there are incredible breaks and electro tunes. When a track is innovative and tight without being cheesy, then it can kick on the dance floor- girls love it. And women are extremely important on a dance floor. Sexy girls I need.” (Time Out)

 

Berlin BPitch chief Ellen Allien less so.

Jonty Skrufff (JontySkrufff.com)